Love Types
PSYCHOLOGICAL LOVE TYPES
We perceive through four different modes -- the logical reality of thought-processes and ideas, the feeling reality based on emotions and memories, the concrete reality of direct sensation, and the intuitive reality of visionary anticipation.
Jung classified personalities into four types based of these distinctions, yet felt no one should be "boxed into" a category, since we all exhibit traits of other types. Typology is a tool we can use for gaining insight and improving relations and communication. It harks back to the ancient "doctrine of humors," and the astrological signs.
The most primary is distinction is between introversion and extroversion. Introverts tend to follow their own dictates, while extroverts are very concerned with the reactions of others. The thinking and feeling functions are considered rational or logical processes, while sensation and intuition creates "quantum leaps" in consciousness or impulsive behavior.
The only value of classification of types lies in its application, to gain an understanding of the thought processes, values, and perceptual modes of those who differ from us. Knowing our own type helps us be objective about our style of loving. Jung said we are fairly competent in 2 or 3 of the functions, but the 4th one is unusually weak or inferior due to lack of conscious adaptation in that area. The 4th function is generally the opposite of the primary function. For example, thinking types have trouble with feelings; feelers have trouble with logical thinking. So, the fourth function works unconsciously and causes sabotage or disruption.
Yet complementary opposites attract and even fascinate each other. Many times we play Pygmalion to our lovers. We go to all the bother of finding and bonding with a person totally unlike ourselves -- and then compulsively try to transform that partner into our own image or ideal. Of course, there is no way to do this, but the attempt does the damage. It is a projection of our own desire to change ourselves. Devotion means different things to different types. We generally love the way we want to be loved, rather than meet the needs of our partner for feeling loved in a way they can relate to.
The different types have very different needs for solitude, confrontation, entertainment, novelty, thrill-seeking, exploration, faithfulness, recreation, spirituality, security, stability, touching, romance, intimacy, eroticism, passion, and sexual contact. Some types seem warmer than others, while others are more generous or fun-loving. Each has a different internal blueprint or love map and agenda with a time-scale for love's progression or growth-curve. Compatibility of general lifestyle and sexual rhythms is important.
We must avoid gross over-generalizations since most people are mixtures of types. A dynamic balance is considered ideal. Then we have the option of using all functions or attitudes when appropriate. In the HOLISTIC HEALTH LIFEBOOK, Strephon Kaplan Williams outlines the main traits of these basic personality types:
Sensation Person: One whose main focus is on the details and concreteness of reality. Such a person gives great attention to detail, to getting things just right, ignoring the larger perspective, or the feeling level of a situation. Engineers, rule followers, lawyers, office workers, accountants, and perfectionists fall generally within this type. The present is their predominant orientation. Sensation types are the touchy-feely people who like physical proximity and sensuality; they live for the moment without much regard for consequences.
Intuitives: The intuitive is the opposite of the sensation person. Intuitives cannot be bothered with details, and are concerned only with perceiving the whole, with having great insights, and with unlimited creativity. They will often start projects that never get finished in detail. Sudden insights and creative ideas out of the blue are their forte. Scientists, therapists, and psychics are among the ranks of the intuitives. The intuitive is always focused on the future, in anticipation; the present is never good enough; the past is quickly forgotten. They are inventive lovers with an infinite capacity for novelty.
Thinking Types: The organizers of society, with either facts, ideas, or people. Thinking involves making or discovering links between people or things. Mathematicians, teachers, executives, lawyers and writers are some of the cool and objective thinking types. They may not be as demonstrative, but their loves are as deep and meaningful as any. When they think things are going well in their relationships, right or wrong, they tend to go back to work. They relate the past to the present and future to make decisive choices.
Feeling Types: Feeling is the relational function, the expression of positive and negative energy -- liking this or not liking that. Feeling organizes reality, rather than perceiving it as does intuition. Feeling types are harmonizers and socializers who work well with people. Teachers, therapist, and all kinds of people-helpers are found among this type. Feeling types are great gossipers and dancers, who love body contact. On the other hand, they have the greatest "freakouts," for they live the relational life at double the intensity of most. Feeling types dwell in and on the past, positive or negative.—Iona Miller
We perceive through four different modes -- the logical reality of thought-processes and ideas, the feeling reality based on emotions and memories, the concrete reality of direct sensation, and the intuitive reality of visionary anticipation.
Jung classified personalities into four types based of these distinctions, yet felt no one should be "boxed into" a category, since we all exhibit traits of other types. Typology is a tool we can use for gaining insight and improving relations and communication. It harks back to the ancient "doctrine of humors," and the astrological signs.
The most primary is distinction is between introversion and extroversion. Introverts tend to follow their own dictates, while extroverts are very concerned with the reactions of others. The thinking and feeling functions are considered rational or logical processes, while sensation and intuition creates "quantum leaps" in consciousness or impulsive behavior.
The only value of classification of types lies in its application, to gain an understanding of the thought processes, values, and perceptual modes of those who differ from us. Knowing our own type helps us be objective about our style of loving. Jung said we are fairly competent in 2 or 3 of the functions, but the 4th one is unusually weak or inferior due to lack of conscious adaptation in that area. The 4th function is generally the opposite of the primary function. For example, thinking types have trouble with feelings; feelers have trouble with logical thinking. So, the fourth function works unconsciously and causes sabotage or disruption.
Yet complementary opposites attract and even fascinate each other. Many times we play Pygmalion to our lovers. We go to all the bother of finding and bonding with a person totally unlike ourselves -- and then compulsively try to transform that partner into our own image or ideal. Of course, there is no way to do this, but the attempt does the damage. It is a projection of our own desire to change ourselves. Devotion means different things to different types. We generally love the way we want to be loved, rather than meet the needs of our partner for feeling loved in a way they can relate to.
The different types have very different needs for solitude, confrontation, entertainment, novelty, thrill-seeking, exploration, faithfulness, recreation, spirituality, security, stability, touching, romance, intimacy, eroticism, passion, and sexual contact. Some types seem warmer than others, while others are more generous or fun-loving. Each has a different internal blueprint or love map and agenda with a time-scale for love's progression or growth-curve. Compatibility of general lifestyle and sexual rhythms is important.
We must avoid gross over-generalizations since most people are mixtures of types. A dynamic balance is considered ideal. Then we have the option of using all functions or attitudes when appropriate. In the HOLISTIC HEALTH LIFEBOOK, Strephon Kaplan Williams outlines the main traits of these basic personality types:
Sensation Person: One whose main focus is on the details and concreteness of reality. Such a person gives great attention to detail, to getting things just right, ignoring the larger perspective, or the feeling level of a situation. Engineers, rule followers, lawyers, office workers, accountants, and perfectionists fall generally within this type. The present is their predominant orientation. Sensation types are the touchy-feely people who like physical proximity and sensuality; they live for the moment without much regard for consequences.
Intuitives: The intuitive is the opposite of the sensation person. Intuitives cannot be bothered with details, and are concerned only with perceiving the whole, with having great insights, and with unlimited creativity. They will often start projects that never get finished in detail. Sudden insights and creative ideas out of the blue are their forte. Scientists, therapists, and psychics are among the ranks of the intuitives. The intuitive is always focused on the future, in anticipation; the present is never good enough; the past is quickly forgotten. They are inventive lovers with an infinite capacity for novelty.
Thinking Types: The organizers of society, with either facts, ideas, or people. Thinking involves making or discovering links between people or things. Mathematicians, teachers, executives, lawyers and writers are some of the cool and objective thinking types. They may not be as demonstrative, but their loves are as deep and meaningful as any. When they think things are going well in their relationships, right or wrong, they tend to go back to work. They relate the past to the present and future to make decisive choices.
Feeling Types: Feeling is the relational function, the expression of positive and negative energy -- liking this or not liking that. Feeling organizes reality, rather than perceiving it as does intuition. Feeling types are harmonizers and socializers who work well with people. Teachers, therapist, and all kinds of people-helpers are found among this type. Feeling types are great gossipers and dancers, who love body contact. On the other hand, they have the greatest "freakouts," for they live the relational life at double the intensity of most. Feeling types dwell in and on the past, positive or negative.—Iona Miller
